Weighting Our VBAC Options

The midwives at Woodwinds gave me a couple different options, all of which pretty much included delivery at St. John's with OB's, not midwives. I could go all the way out to Hudson to a place called Hudson Physicians to see Dr. Hartung, and possibly deliver at Woodwinds. Or I could go to one of the Health East clinics and deliver at St. John's, or I could go to Comprehensive Healthcare for Women in Woodbury (the closest option), and deliver at St. John's. So I tried to get the best references possible... I talked to my friends.

My friend, Chris, had delivered her daughter at St. John's, so I asked about her experiences there. She had nothing but good things to say about them. The nurses were great, and she really liked the on-call doctor (better than the one she had been seeing at one of the Health East clinics for her prenatal care). She said it was great to be able to labor, deliver, and recover all in one room. They had their daughter room in with them, and there were people able to help with lactation. St. John's was sounding better than I had thought. The only downside was that they didn't do waterbirths, but if you're VBAC'ing (in a hospital), you won't be able to do a waterbirth. They do, however, have labor tubs (much smaller, but still just as relaxing) in each room.

So now it was down to where to go for prenatal care. Chris said that going with a Health East clinic meant that you could have whoever was on-call deliver your baby (which turned out fine for her!). But when I talked with Comprehensive Healthcare for Women, one of their three doctors would be delivering your baby (much smaller pool to choose from with them!). I scheduled a consult with Dr. Sam Arnold (their only male doctor), and found out from my sister-in-law that he delivered three of their seven (going on eight) children. She said she really liked him, but I guess he and her husband (who's a big talker) did too much talking while she was in labor for her liking with the last one that he delivered!

We shall see how the consult goes, but I'm starting to get excited about this as an option! I'm just worried that they'll tell us we didn't wait long enough between babies to have a VBAC. But, I'm not someone who will take "no" as an answer on that one!

Last Appointment at Woodwinds

Mary Kempf, a midwife at Woodwinds, called me yesterday to let me know that I will not be able to have a VBAC at Woodwinds in the next six months. We talked about my different options, but none of them really included delivering at Woodwinds. (More on that in another post...) She asked if I wanted to still keep my appointment with her for today, and I said yes. I have been feeling her move quite a bit more now, but it's still reassuring to hear her heart, especially since I won't have another ultrasound for another 4 weeks.

We went in today, and heard her heart beat (it was between 140-150 bpm), and Mary measured my uterus at 17 cm. She said that was a little on the small side, but also commented that I was a little person, so she wasn't worried. (I won't be worried unless Krista tells me that the baby is measuring too small in 4 weeks at the ultrasound.) We asked her a couple questions, and she sent us on our way. These appointments are so short and quick! I'm not used to it!

19 Weeks, 4 Days

Daddy Felt Her!

Last night after we got back from our dinner date at Outback Steakhouse (thanks to Uncle Dan!), we were sitting on the couch watching season 7 of NCIS. The baby was moving all over the place (she must have enjoyed dinner too!). I often think I feel her on my hand when I am touching my tummy, but then Adam doesn't feel her. But I had him put his hand on my tummy anyway. Of course she stopped moving then. A little bit later, I could feel her moving again, and I was pretty sure I could feel her with my hand too. So Adam put his hand back on my tummy, and he felt her moving around!

I think its one of the things that makes it more real for him. The first one is when I start showing, then when he feel her move, and finally when she's here (then it really hits him!). Now I'm excited to cuddle with him at night and have her kick him in the side, just like her big sister did!

Hungry Hiccups!

I hadn't felt the baby move (for sure move, because with where the placenta is, I feel it by my stomach, and am not always sure if it's my tummy or the baby) in a couple days, and, as usual, started to get nervous again.

I was lying in bed this morning trying to fall back asleep after I had gotten up to go to the bathroom (ah, the joys of pregnancy!), but couldn't. My tummy started getting hungry, and I started to feel "movement." Naturally, I thought it was the baby right away, but then realized I was hungry, and figured it was my tummy instead. So I put my hand right there to feel (I can tell the difference between tummy & baby when I have my hand right between the two). I felt nothing at all. So I rolled back over in another attempt to fall asleep.

Attempt failed again, of course. But I started to feel "movement" again. So I put my hand back on my tummy and waited, at this point, I knew I wasn't falling back asleep. I laid there for a little while and felt my tummy telling me it was time to get up & eat, but I didn't have the energy to get up yet. So I kept laying there waiting to feel our daughter let me know she was still alive in there.

I finally felt a little push upward on my hand, then another, and another. I remembered this feeling, though not quite as early with Danni. Our baby had the hiccups! So not only is she alive in there, but she's also practice breathing (Krista saw one breath at the last ultrasound)! Such a great sign of hope, that will get me though until Thursday when we can hear her heartbeat again.

18 Weeks, 4 Days

"Lord, Make Me a Rainbow..."

"... I'll shine down on my mother, she'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors."
-If I Die Young by The Band Perry

 This song came out (or at least I heard it for the first time) shortly after Danni died. It always made me cry, especially this line of the song. It seemed to be a big hit right about then, and was played on the radio quite a bit. So, of course, I cried quite a bit when it came on.

I hadn't heard it in a while, but it came on the radio on my way into school. I don't think I'd heard it on the radio since I'd heard the term Rainbow Baby, so I didn't put two-and-two together until now. This time when I was listening to it, I still teared up, but it was different this time. Danni asked God to send us her little sister. She's shining down on us, sending us hope, and I know she's safe with God in heaven. It's still hard to think that she's not here with us shining the joy that babies bring into their parents' life. But it's what she can give us, and we love her for it.

A Turtle or Pink?

Our appointment was at 2:30, so my co-worker, Sherrie, covered the last 15 minutes or so of my last class, and I got there just in time. Adam was about 5 minutes behind me, but Krista (my favorite ultrasound tech) was already ready for me. So I asked Wendy (the receptionist) to send him back when he got there. I told Krista that we couldn't find out the gender until he got there, or he would be upset. But he got there before she started.

Baby was breach (butt down), which I don't think Danni ever was. Baby was moving all over the place (I had drank half a can of Pepsi, when I rarely ever drink pop). And baby kept putting its hands in front of its face (shy little thing!).

But Krista got a couple nice profile shots of baby!

Krista scanned baby, and baby's legs were crossed, so we couldn't tell yet (Danni always had her legs open for the world to see!). So she started scanning baby's organs and such. Baby's brain is developing normally, kidneys are good, stomach is good, spinal cord with "bowling ball finger holes" (I guess that's a good thing!), little developing bones. In the middle of scanning, there was a knock on the door, and Joan (our genetic counselor) came in, she wanted to see our healthy baby and say congrats. While she was in there, Krista scanned the lenses in baby's eyes, and they reflected back to the probe. Joan said that the first time she saw that was on her own ultrasound, and she was convinced that her baby had a tumor in its eye. Joan left, and Krista scanned baby's 4-chamber heart again (can't get enough of seeing that!).

Textbook 4-chamber heart!

Baby has a 3-vessel cord (Danni's was only two, which is a sign of a heart defect). Krista showed us the 10 fingers and 10 toes again.

Measurement of little right foot!

Little right hand

Krista eventually went back down to baby's bottom to see if she could see a turtle (boy) or three little dots (girl). I couldn't tell with baby's legs crossed, but apparently Krista saw what she needed to, so she wrote on the screen... Adam said he saw three little dots too, but even after she scanned it, I could only see two.

Then Krista tried to get baby to turn so that she could see her aortic arch to make sure the plumbing going to her heart was all good. She kept running the probe down her spine and she much have been ticklish or something cause she kept driving her head up into my the ribs in my back. But eventually she got a good view of her valves and all looked good!

Krista gave us a bunch of pictures, and gave us her growth results. She is measuring at 17 week, 4 days, and we are currently 17 weeks, 2 days, so we're pretty much on schedule. I told her how my mom keeps telling me that this baby is going to be big (since I'm bigger than I was at this point with Danni). I asked Krista what she thought about Danni, with her complications, growing quicker since she was about 2 weeks ahead of what we thought she was. But Krista said usually babies with two vessel cords and other complications grow slower, which is why we were having growth ultrasounds every week.

Then said she would let Dr. Danilenko (many of you may know her as "scary doctor" from Danielle) know that we were waiting for her. Dr. Danilenko came in and said that it was good to see us again. I just smiled, and said, "Yes, you too." She said that all looked good and she did a very quick scan of our baby girl. This time, when she scanned her bottom, I could see three little dots! She gave us a referral slip for a 20-week ultrasound, and we scheduled it with Wendy on our way out. (Of course, Krista said that everything that she would be scanning for at the 20-week level II, she had already seen at this appointment.)

On our way out, Adam texted my mom and told her that her and I would have a lot of shopping to do. So mom texted back saying that it's a boy! And Adam replied, "No, she needs more pink clothes!"

More Movement than I Thought!

On Sunday morning, we were laying in bed, and Adam had his arm across my tummy, right at the top of my uterus. I could really feel the baby kicking, and asked Adam if he could feel it too, but he couldn't. So I just laid there enjoying the tiny kicks of tiny feet.

That night, I realized that I had probably been feeling the baby move a lot more than what I had thought. Since the placenta is in the front, I can't really feel the baby kick in the front, but on the top of my uterus. I remember feeling movement there often, and pausing. Then I just thought, oh, that's my stomach... again. I think all this time it was the baby!

Starving!

Pretty much all this week, I've been starving all the time. I can barely make it through a class period without eating, which makes it hard to tell the kids they can't eat in the classroom, while I'm chowing down.

********* Long pause ************

Sorry, had to get a snack before dinner.

I don't remember ever being this hungry with Danielle, but I'm wondering if it's in part due to being sick for a week and not eating as much. Now I need to catch up and chow down! Speaking of food, here's a picture of how big I'm getting...

16 Weeks, 4 Days